July 12, 2007

Funky feelings

So, yeah, posting that last night helped a little bit. Very little, but it did help. This one is really sticking around for some reason. Sometimes, I feel like I'm a volcano of emotions and feelings and things that just need to be said... gotten out... and at any second, unbeknown to me, I'm going to just erupt. Unannounced, unprovoked, out of the blue. And risk it all. Like if I show the 'real me', I won't be lovable anymore.

Wow? Where in the hell did all of that come from? Way down deep, I tell you. Territories I don't even dare to tread.

Guess maybe I'd better start getting my toes in.

1 comment:

BetteJo said...

"Like if I show the 'real me', I won't be lovable anymore."

I SO remember that feeling. I had forgotten that part of it - must mean I really AM properly medicated! :)

It's awful though. I am blogging about depression right now after reading your post about it the other night. It was time to talk about it, but you unintentionally gave me a push. That's a good thing.

I can't tell you how long I truly didn't want anyone to know the "real me" - because I was convinced I would be alone. :(

It will get better. Sorry, I know platitudes don't help much.

Hang in there! You're not alone.